But never again use another person’s body or emotions as a scratching post for your own unfulfilling yearnings.
I don’t know if you’ll understand this, Emmy, but for me, fear isn’t actually a bad thing. It’s a primitive instinct that’s your friend. It warns you to pay attention, because you’re in danger. It tells you to do something, to act to save yourself. I read a book about this recently. The guy who wrote it said that the ability to become aware of fear is a gift. That if you honour that gift - if you notice it when you are afraid and if you respond to your fear instead of ignoring it, you will be safer. Run, he says, run when your fear tells you to. But he doesn’t talk about what happens to your gift of fear when you live with the feeling all the time.